12 Times to Hold Your Tongue

12 Times to Hold Your Tongue

Adapted from the Discipleship Journal

1. When you have a criticism about a church service or ministry leader. It will only be destructive to call someone’s attention to the flaw you’ve noticed.

2. When you’re tempted to say, “I told you so.”

3. When you want to complain about the weather, the traffic, the policy, the president, your spouse, your kids... anything. Think about how grumbling affects others, and choose to focus on the positive.

4. When you’re criticized. A response may be called for but it is usually best not to give it in the heat of the moment.

5. When you have information that makes someone look bad.

6. When someone is upset about a problem or something that’s happened and you’ve had a similar experience. Relate what you went through only if your objective is to pass on something you learned – be sure you’re not shifting the focus of the conversation to yourself.

7. When you’re tempted to judge or criticize someone.

8. When a friend’s situation would make a great point in the conversation, but you don’t have their permission to share their story with others. For example, you’re discussing problems in marriage and you want to say, “I have a friend whose husband...” Even if you don’t use their name, you’re treading on dangerous ground.

9. When you’re tempted to correct someone on a minor point as they relate a story or experience.

10. When you think someone has made a poor decision, but it’s too late for them to change their mind. And, in most cases, be silent when people haven’t asked for your opinion about what they should do.

11. When you’re tempted to tell something about yourself for the purpose of impressing someone.

12. When you have information that might discourage others. Don’t tell labor horror stories to a woman who’s pregnant for the first time, and don’t mention that someone you know of died from the disease that your friend’s family member just contracted.